Humanize to Connect: Connect to serve, sell, understand and inspire
There are a million tips on how to sell, persuade, inspire, connect and engage. One of the most important ones is usually left out.
Social media remains central to many marketing efforts, but it is the same environment that creates a lack of connection among people (no matter how many “like” or “friends” they have) according to research; web funnel pages capture attention and offer freebies in exchange for email addresses; copywriting and advertising experts utilize words that trigger responses in readers’ brains to connect to the message; and more. Much more. There is certainly a lot of science in sales, marketing, fundraising, relationship development, etc. strategies, but there seems to be one, simple thing missing.
Granted, the sciences can explain why this all works, but perhaps we can step back from the strategy of persuasion and manipulation and take a path of humanization.
E. M. Forster wrote in Howard’s End, “Only connect! That was the whole of her sermon. Only connect the prose and the passion, and both will be exalted, and human love will be seen at its height. Live in fragments no longer. Only connect…”
In this fragmented, microwave-ready, nanosecond world we live in, focus on connecting the prose and the passion. Humanize. Be real. Remember genuineness, emotion and authenticity. Consider in operations manuals and web sites, funding proposals and billboards, content and captions … be real. Be human.
Three Things to Remember
It’s Not About You. It is important to personalize, to be sure. As Dale Carnegie reminded us decades ago, one of the favorite words people like to hear is their own name. Mail merge salutations utilize that important fact. Messaging that connects does more than make a lot of use of “you” and first name merges; it remembers that the message is about the reader, the user, the funder, the client … not the one who wrote it. Even professional bios can be written in ways that the reader wants to know the profiled person and use their expertise. Instead, many (most) profiles read like a prose version of a CV.
No matter the message, remember the reader first … no matter who the reader is.
Laughter and Tears are Universal. This truism is more than simply that. It is the essential emotional truth. Granted, there are myriad emotions. Philosophers and psychologists have explored how many emotional states there really are for centuries. Simplify, simplify in your messaging. Everyone laughs. Everyone cries. Not all laughter is joyful, and not are tears are sad. They are all quite human. When communicating, consider the simplicity of laughter and tears. I had a friend who used to ask me regularly, “Who did you make cry today?” That sounds terrible, but they were tears of joy, or they resulted because of an emotional touch that moved them. My LIFElines workshops always draw laughter and tears. They are basic, authentic and genuine. When communicating, depend less on the nuanced, sophisticated research of trigger words and remember … laughter and tears are universal.
Discover Stories – Theirs and Yours. The Hopi Indians are attributed to this quote, “Those who tell the stories rule the world.” There is power in storytelling, and history is rife with examples of sinister uses of manipulation of stories for power, as well as full of glorious messages of joy and hope found in stories. Everywhere you look today, you’ll find reminders that storytelling is the way to go. I suggest storylistening, too. Share and connect with stories, but also empower and inquire as to the stories of others. Learn how to ask questions and lead conversations that enable others to find and share their stories. Great “conversationalists” are usually those who talk less and let others share more. Even when the shared words are not in conversations, you can provide in content, proposals and manuscripts leads where readers tell their own stories in their minds. They recall examples of laughter and tears, and of moments.
Differentiate from the rushing river of data, psychology studies, customer behavior analysis. Humanize your messages and mindset. The research and data will prove the objective value, and your heart will verify the subjective success of doing so.