“Thank you for the hug.  I haven’t had a hug in ten years,” the man said.

Just the notion was incomprehensible to me. I looked at the man who shared the story as if he had said something in an alien language or had shared something so unrealistic that it could not be true. He assured the rest of us at the dinner table that the story was, indeed, true.

The dinner was during a men’s retreat and he was sharing his experiences from working in a prison ministry. The unit that he serves is for prisoners with life sentences. All of us within earshot of his statement were visibly taken aback by what one of the prisoners told the man. The men at the table were men who hugged their spouses, kids, friends…to hear ‘I haven’t been hugged in ten years” was almost disorienting.

There was great value in the disorientation; we were reminded how important hugs are.  It also reminded us of how taken for granted they can be.

Don’t be afraid to hug, as long as the recipient is okay with being hugged, of course. I am reminded of a speaker at a chamber of commerce presentation about 40 years ago who was promoting the idea of being a hugger. She pretty much blocked the door so everyone would give her a hug on the way out of the event. Some people found a secondary exit to avoid what felt like a forced hug-for-effect instead of a genuine expression.

Be real; be authentic; be sincere; hug the people you love.