Over the weekend, I had the pleasure of my youngest son’s company for a couple of days. Along with some fishing and shooting, there was, as always, chatting and laughing. Topics are always far-ranging, and this weekend was no exception.

He shared about one of his neighbors. Several of his other neighbors talk about the man in question with judgements about how he is anti-social, unfriendly, etc. My son thought there might be more to the story, including the well-known fact that the man’s wife left him fairly recently. Everyone has a story and a reality that others don’t know about and my son figured it would be worth challenging the status quo “understanding” of the neighbor by making a point to wave and say hello. The man returned my son’s wave. Now, if my son is out while the man is walking, he will call out a greeting to my son by name. The neighbor has not turned out to the neighborhood party animal, but he is not the curmudgeonly, unfriendly recluse that the gossip painted him out to be.

As our conversation continued, we discussed a variety of people types. Some people have a hard time reaching out but will respond when given the chance. Some folks are gregarious and outgoing. People are not always the same for their lifespan; people change because life happens. I referenced the historically reclusive writer, J. D. Salinger who became famous for his classic Catcher in the Rye. I also mentioned the movie, Finding Forester, starring Sean Connery. My son was not familiar with either work, but Salinger and the Forester character fueled our conversation about how people’s actions can be misinterpreted and become fuel for unnecessary gossip that has no business being spread.

Sometimes a person needs only an incident of event to trigger a recessive characteristic. I know it wouldn’t take much of a nudge to move me into a more reclusive lifestyle. So be it. People are not always as they appear, nor will they always be the way they are. Love your neighbor by not spreading gossip based on assumptions.