As a teenager, I wrote a poem about an old man. It made my dad cry, and he was not one to cry often. The opening stanza read:

Old man can you manage
With that cane in your hand?
Can you continue watching
The dropping of the sand?

I am now about eight years older than he was when he read it. Perspective matters.

My writings were influenced by Tom Rush’s “Old Man’s Song.” A commenter on Rush’s YouTube channel said, “When I was young this song was about my grandfather, as I grew older this song was about my father, now I’m in my 70’s this song is about me!!” And, I think, that’s the point about perspective:  seek it anew over time. Perspective takes time.

While there may not be substitutes for the effect on perspectives that living provides, we can gain a bit by paying attention to life and to others.  Listen to life. Listen to those around you. Though I was 43 years younger than dad, observing him gave me perspectives on aging, some of which prepared for me doing so, and some of which were lacking in wisdom. Paying attention to poetry, literature and lyrics can shape and improve perspectives, too. I still remember being in the back seat of a station wagon, being driven with a bunch of other high school runners from a neighboring school back to our own school, and the song “Old Man” by Neil Young came on the radio. “Old man /  look at my life / I’m a lot like you were.” Youth looking forward, or age looking back, the view is important, valuable and instructive.

My point isn’t really about aging, though the concept fascinates me more and more. I am now close to the age that my dad was when he died, and I am struck now by the fact that he did not live to be an old man.  I know that because I don’t feel like one.  Perspective.

We should treasure the polishing of perspectives that comes with the passing of time, if we are paying attention to what is happening around us and in our own lives. Perspectives shift about jobs, parenting, the rat race, promotions, the importance of money, stress and so much more. I have had frequent wonderments about what my mom and dad would think about so many of the things that nowadays are considered necessities in life that they considered luxuries. Hmmm, maybe I don’t need that such-and-such thing after all. But, I sort of do know what they would think because I watched, listened and paid attention to their stories, though they may not have realized it at the time.

What we don’t gain in years, we can gain, somewhat at least, by listening to others. By paying attention to life. By watching and learning…and growing. It all goes both ways, though; we can learn from those younger and older than ourselves, more accomplished and less successful, richer and poorer, more educated and less educated, wiser and less wise…and so on, and so on.

Your steps are now in inches
Yesterday they were in miles
How come?  What is it old man
That continues to bring you smiles?

Fifty years after I penned those lines, I think the answer is perspective.